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This film has been an exceptional help over the last couple of weeks for me.
There are parts of myself, sexually, that have been re-emerging of late and I have been trying to squash and deny. Being interested in sex with people other than my S.O. doesn’t make me a bad partner and lover. It doesn’t mean there is something wrong with me. In fact a lot of what I fantasise about involves my partner and often has an element of him watching or ‘controlling’ the proceedings. Being grown up enough to be able to communicate this desire, articulate how I think it can happen and hopefully pursue it healthily IS the right thing to do.
We had a fantastic conversation about attraction to others, threesomes, sex, sexual adventures and openness to relationships. It was awesome. I aim for these kinds of conversations to continue and that we can work out exactly what we’re comfy with here and now. There are some things I want to explore, but not to the detriment of my partner or our relationship – baby steps.
and the skin you inhabit.
Unconditionally, with gusto, passion, reverence – whatever is good and right for you.
Because your body is the vehicle that gets you out of the bed in the morning, into the sunshine and the wider world you live and partipate in. Your body literally takes you to the places you want to go.
Your physical form is what you use to jump for joy, dance like a mofo, stomp in the dirt at a doof, reach for the lasers, climb trees, hug your friends, loved ones and fuck the one you’re with. It’s the flesh you feel when you’re pressed up against another and in no other place can you experience orgasm, but within your body.
Not only that, but you can MAKE other people if you so choose and it’s a decision you make for yourself. It’s pretty incredible that we have this option, whether we take it up or not.
We are each assigned but one earthly vessel, although I guess this kinda depends on your school of thought… never the less, this life is generally the only one you control and will remember so be grateful, in knowing you’re blessed with the machinery that you use, without thought, every day of your life.
Sometimes our body fails, breaks, doesn’t work like it should, hurts or frustrates the fuck out of us, we don’t like ‘this’ or ‘that’ and I really think that’s what makes us human and is such a massive part of the human experience.
Fat, thin, wobbly, taunt, old, young, damaged, pristine, enhanced, in a natural state or any form and variations you can think of your body works endlessly for you and enables such a large amount of what you experience.
My journey to this point of view has been winding, long and challenging, it is far from over and sometimes I falter, disparage myself from that nasty little place inside my head and destructively criticise myself. I won’t ever give up trying though, I *want* to feel predominantly good about myself, I am working on being healthier and becoming stronger and know that I possess the power to change so much of myself.
I am not just gunning for myself though, I hope I can teach my beautiful neice and some day my own child, by example, a healthy and caring relationship with your body, but be honest and brave enough to show that I do, at times struggle.
*Stop* for just a moment and appreciate all that your body does for you, despite it’s perceived or actual shortcomings and actively send some love to yourself and especially focus that love towards whatever it is you hate.
For me, I am loving my thighs – every fleshy inch, of which there is many I accept that I’m actively trying to change the appearance of this particular part of my body, but also acknowledge how hard this integral structural part of myself works for me and is a really important part of a self that brings me so much happiness in so many ways.