You are currently browsing the monthly archive for January 2010.

I have been lacking  in this department for the past little while.  Sorry to those I’ve left hanging, but I have been somewhat bereft of any energy in this space.  When this occurs I would rather take a step back than produce subpar writing or content.

Never fear though!  I am back and digging around in my drafts, as I have at least noted down noteworthy occurances over the past short while.  Things have been pretty peachy with my man and our relationship is going strong, our sexual energy is growing and deepening…  We’ve been having some particularly awesome and nasty sex of late which I am truly looking forward to articulating here.

Been to a bush doof last week also…  Had a rather spectacular lsd induced moment of self loving there too, my guy was by my side in our tent, albiet unconscious and kinda snoring –  it was pretty fucking brilliant him just being there while I experienced such pleasure and joy though.

So looking forward to sharing all the thoughts and experiences of my past little while and  this is in no small part to the fact writing in general will be so much easier as I purchased myself a little acer netbook yesterday.

This post was brought to you by the letter B.  B is for bed, which is where I am currently comfortably propped up and typing away.

Awesomesauce. xo

Why is this so?

I have slept with many men in my short, but adventurous 24 years (almpst 25 now) and up until my current partner I have noticed men, in my experience, do not wear sexual sensation on their faces and are reluctant to vocalise.

I’ve seen a fairly significant amount of content over at (see the banner on the left) and my experience kind of rings true there as well, ladies seem much more at ease and relaxed in their sexual exploration of themselves.

So whether in partnered pursuits or seemingly on their own, guys, at large seem to contain their sexual energy within and I really want to know why…

My current partner is possibly the best sexual partner I’ve ever had.  A big part of why, is his uninhibited and unselfconscious manner in whatever sexual task is at hand.  What makes him even more so the best partner, is just watching his face express all the nuisances of the sensation when we’re fucking does so much for me, hearing the cries, moans and erratic breathing when hes in my mouth makes me insanely aroused.

His face and vocalisations at the point of orgasm absolutely blow me away.  His obvious and unabashed pleasure increases my own pleasure.

Is this then, the only time in my life where I have gained true intimacy with someone, so that they’re comfortable in allowing me to see them as they truly are?  No.  I don’t think so.  Because the sex I have had with women, whilst not as prolific as my hetero fucks, has been of the honest and expressive quality that I am currently having with my guy.

Which leaves me perplexed about the reasoning behind this behavoural difference in sex between men and women.

Funny shit on the internet is kind of one of my hobbies, have been a fan of these guys for quite some time now. is an excellent mixture of awkward, epic trashiness, sexual fails and wins and some just plain wrong (but totally awesome) stuff.  I warn you though, it is some seriously crass stuff.  If you thought I was highbrow you best look away from this post.  Wait… that doesn’t sound right, no one thinks I’m highbrow!

A handpicked sample for your reading pleasure and puerile amusement:

(919): I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen

(678): My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled “Walrus sucks his own dick” and then wrote in the email “I wish I were a walrus”. What the fuck is wrong with my family?

(480): she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.

(419): I was so high last night that i’m 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes

(619): You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.

(614): Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
(1-614): Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.

(303): i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth… fuckin epic

(301): i just yelled “run, its godzirra!” to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test

(669): sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall

(518): my roommate’s gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her…

(610): I can’t finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it’s time to go to the library…

(305): I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls

(330): He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he’s a goddamn genius.

(804): Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.

(405): I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome

(864): he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.

(404): If I was on drugs, this would be amazing

(617): You probably shouldn’t be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head

(617): I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you

(702): And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse

(732): I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.

(832): Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!

(224): bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.

(508): Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.

(386): i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena

(215): I was like, “um, that’s my butthole.”

(818): Do you reaalllllly want to put “porn editor” on your resume?

(818): question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?

(919): And when I look at him, I just want him to say “I love you” in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.

(989): I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.

(580): White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I’m healthy.

(585): This is why I shouldn’t be left alone with liquor and anticipation.

(219): I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had “you win” written on it. Do I celebrate?

(918): At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting…then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.

(248): The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.

(313): Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.

(970): Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it’s so cute.

(301): Fuck appropriateness.

(206): i’m sure there’s a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.

(610): If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.

I received my long awaited and much anticipated spanking.

This is a pre 2010 story too.  Sorry for it’s belatedness but I have been on holidays and there has been much craziness at work for the past week.

Spanking is something I have been wanting to explore for some time now…  The likes of Zille (see her blog on my blog roll) have slowly but surely drawn me into fetishising this act more and more.  My current partner is open to new experiences, generally, but especially sexually.  He already finds power play appealing and after watching some spanking stuff together and talking about doing it ourselves, a whooooooole lot, an opportunity *finally* arose .

We have both built this experience up quite a bit, there have been several times where we thought our housemates would be out and disappointingly there have been people home.

I think it was actually Christmas eve.  We were at my place and had been up for a while…  With no work to rush off to we had indulged in a morning of rather lazy sex.  After getting up, breakfasting and pottering about, my housemate announced he was off to do some shopping… or some activity away from the house.  As soon as he left and we raced into my room.

As we dashed in my bedroom door, I felt his hand clasp my left hip firmly and with the other he literally bent me over my bed.  My dress was roughly pulled up and knickers were removed.  This act in itself I found really really hot.

The slaps started lightly and on my right butt cheek.  They increased in intensity and then he started alternating at random between my left and right butt cheeks.  It felt amazing.  I was exceptionally aroused, this merely increased as the spanking went on and with each stinging smack I could feel myself become wetter and wetter.  It wasn’t really what I’d describe as pain, but I’m pretty sure I went into an altered state of consciousness – I seriously felt like I was high.  My perception of pain was most likely significantly altered.  There was a massive release of dopamine, because I didn’t orgasm, but it sure felt like something very similar, but much longer than an orgasm.

My butt became hot and he began interspersing the slaps with little light rubbing motions on my bum cheeks.  This felt beyond incredible, just remembering it now brings the hairs on the backs of my arms up.

He became a little carried away at points, the smacks were too close together and I communicated this verbally, in time I hope we can transmit these indications in a non-verbal way as talking seemed to kind of break the reverie I was in.  He also needs to work on his technique some, a few of the smacks landed as blows, unintentionally but they hurt all the same.  I guess like any other sexual act you need to practice to get it just right.

Now, I couldn’t actually tell you how long the spanking lasted…  I completely lost track of time.

Afterward we wandered into the bathroom so I could look at my reddened bottom.  I would have really liked for us to be able to have more sex at this point, seeing those bright red marks was dementedly arousing, but being Christmas eve and all we had a million things to go and do, so I quickly redressed and we headed out.

The uncomfortable feeling every time I sat down brought a big grin to my face for the rest of the day.

All in all a brilliant first-time spanking experience. I think it was made so by a caring, loving and enthusiastic partner whom I have a great deal of trust in.  I didn’t have to worry about anything but enjoying the experience.  And it was totally rad.

We aim to revisit it once we get some goddamned privacy.

My Sexy Brains

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